Bulleted entry

22 Jun

So how are we doing out there? So we havent been here for some days. Well updation will happen in the discreet, not flashy, no big words, no excel format we MBAs are taught in B-School. We shall instead have it in bullets. All gist and no fat. Lean mean machine. Ok I will stop it.

  • We were busy with work. Now before you roll off that chair clutching your intestines afraid they may fall out at so much humor so soon, there’s a reason for that. I had a talk with boss-man who equated my work to no-work but not so politely. So in an attempt to prove him wrong I went all guns blazing and working my substantial behind off, only to be informed he would be moving out to an international role in a week and wouldnt quite be around when one finishes with the blazing guns business.
  • And tired of all the complaining one has been doing about the heat and the dust and the tan, the good Lord above has landed a smack on the cheek called the monsoons. So apart from exposing Mumbai municipality year after year monsoons also turn dusty roads into miles and miles of brown squishy muck with a good amount of gobar thrown in. So as one in treading cautiously on such ways and paths, a nice humongous state transport bus comes behind screeching and honking till every one in near vicinity has turned deaf leaving one the option of being crushed to death immediately or jump headlong into particularly squishy gooey muck which will then proceed to dry slowly on body, dress and sandals.
  • In between all this unhappy circumstances the BF was in town for his induction. His generous company was putting him up in a 15k per night hotel. Nights he was spending with 23/m/CA also with the same company. So got all goodies BF bought from foreign sojourn. Saw a weighing machine in his room and jumped on it. Saw that oneself had lost a couple of kilos, delighted quickly stuffed one self’s mouth with foreign chocolate which melted quietly and slid towards the waist where they will multiply, apply for green card and settle down permanently.
  • We also went to see Sarkar Raj late night. I know its the fashionable and in thing to rubbish RGV’s effort. Every Masand worth his IBN is at it but I liked it even though I had to poke BF in ribs every fifteen minutes when his snores would get to loud. Also Forum in Cal serves the WORST mall food ever. I was never the mall food fan but I do believe edibility being a criteria for qualifying as food. Not to mention stale and marked up over the MRP.
  • On body issues front I have been trying not to pounce on every meal as a Somalia returned,last meal type and appreciate the beauty and total inadequacy of small portions. Also read in every “0 carbs diet” and “all protein diet” website how important its to retain muscles which the body quickly sheds when one diets while the fat hug on to the hips so I flay my arms around every morning hoping to break into a sweat. I mean if I could touch my toes with my fingers I wouldnt need to exercise would I.
  • Also got the first salary. So now I can buy the pretty dresses instead of going into shop, screaming in delight, rushing to trial room, putting on dress, exclaiming how wonderful/gorgeous/spectacular one looked in it, how this one dress can turn all men into ones slaves and then look at the price tag, come out complaining loudly for all sales staff in earshot about ill-fit. Now I will waltz into show rooms, pick up the fabulous dress, skip into trial room, do snake dance to wriggle into dress , find unflattering masses of flesh poking out of inappropriate places , quietly motion to the sales staff to get one size bigger and be told that what we have on is the largest size available. See God works in mysterious ways.

So we are done with the points. The message is successfully delivered that one is happy and carefree in one s existence in 250 bucks per day room in east Midnapore. Lately lot of people have been telling how I need to cut the yo-eraser-up-my-nose-so-funny act and write about serious stuff. Promise the next one will a well researched document on the effects of nuclear treaty between Iran and China or my life which as I know is the centre of the universe. So till then.

PS: I wrote this post and clicked on publish and got a screen which told me publishing failed. I smirked and went to the drafts section only to find it has not been saved. Smirk wiped off I re-wrote it. Yes dearies I love you so much. All this when I have 2 ppts to make and a bus at 5 am to catch.


Posted by on June 22, 2008 in life, Uncategorized


7 responses to “Bulleted entry

  1. anuj bansal

    June 22, 2008 at 11:32 am

    Salary no.2

    a=500, d = 1000; 😛

  2. Balu

    June 22, 2008 at 11:34 am

    “substantial behind”?? That was really funny.

    I hereby promise to use it in all my conversation involving, well.. “substantial behind”. I wonder what sort of reaction I will get when I call someone a “substantial behind” hole.

    “The BF” might have been working his substantial behind off too. So no complaints please.

    It is a well “re-written” post 🙂

  3. Brijesh

    June 23, 2008 at 12:50 am

    We are wondering who wants to read serious stuff!!
    and we are also glad to empathize with those who are losing weight and able to wriggle into fabulous apparel

  4. Balu

    June 23, 2008 at 3:27 am

    This is cheating.. i commented first

  5. WSW

    June 23, 2008 at 12:00 pm

    salary no 1
    a=10000. enough!

    the system doesnt cheat!! but it can behave like a “substantial behind” hole.

    the weight lost was subsequently gained back as the ‘substantial behind’ missed the paunch

  6. Aparajita

    June 25, 2008 at 1:52 pm

    Hey!! I am a friend of Siraj’s. Have loved reading your blog, even when you were not wanting to be superwoman in wordpress. I completely empathise wth ‘ill-fit’ dilemma. Hav even been to shops whr ppl hav told me outright that they do not hav anything in my ‘type’, not size but type. But I have always managed to drown the sorrows of failed shopping in soft-centred heavenly chocolate… I think I haev written a post of mine here… Sowwie 🙂
    Anyways do keep posting. M ardently following your BLT diary.

  7. Retard

    June 28, 2008 at 4:20 pm

    Back to reading your blogs madam. As always, you have a fantastic view of life. 🙂


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