And just like that..

..I got my Mojo back.

Lets just say one quick tour of my “friends list” on any social networking site reveals “committed”,”engaged” or “married” updates. Now I can either pretend that “haha, marriage is for chumps” and go about my life or I could face the mirror and ask myself why the heck is it bothering me that my status has not changed lets see…from the past so many years except a brief bout of blissful singledom in between.

Today I was talking to another unmarried friend and we discussed how it doesnt matter that we have a better bank balance than most men have, we have good careers and are fun, interesting people. All that comes to a naught because if-she-is-not-married-yet-there-must-be-something-wrong-with-her.

And when I was busy dissing people for always following up a “hi” with a “so when are you settling down” I realised the maximum pressure was being put on me by myself. My parents havent really bugged me, all my really close friends are unmarried, the person I want to marry eventually isnt too keen right now-then why the hell am I battering myself by comparing myself to others getting hitched.

Its not a competition even if people keep comparing you to other in-campus romances. They did what suited them and you are doing what suits you. Just like some one chose “derivatives and structures” and I took “international marketing”.

After so many months I have finally found peace in knowing I am okay doing my own thing and him doing his thing. The only thing I really miss is the company we give each other in going to new places, trying new things. And that has nothing to do with “where are we going with this” , its more because there is a 1000kms of physical distance between us and a JetLight ticket also costs 12k one way.

And before I lash at anyone else for judging me, I have got to stop judging myself. I have to stop thinking that the final proof of my “achiever” status is to have a ring on my finger and a chain on my neck. In thinking all this I am losing precious self time where I can do so much for myself.

Its just a number twenty-five not a death toll to jump or perish. I dont know why I have penned something so personal without hiding it in obtuse poetry, but I actually feel a weight lift of my shoulders once I put my life in perspective.

No more self inflicted misery. I need to learn to swim, dance and drive a car before I jump into some well of self loathing. On that note-first car-alto vs xing vs i10?

To wake up or not!

I have what my friends call an irritating habit, I read up on a movie before I watch it. But I like it. It makes me understand a movie better, because there are certain things in a review which click only when you watch a movie. Its those small ‘aha’ moments that I enjoy a lot.

Wake Up Sid has got mostly favorable reviews by critics but majority of my friends found it boring and predictable. As for me-I think it had its moments but not enough to make the cut.

There is Sid, your average aimless Joe who finds direction and discovers love in the course of the movie. There are genuinely-too close for comfort scenes like when he admonishes his mom for constantly lecturing and then gives her one more tee-shirt to fold. Or even his confrontation with his Dad. But these Oh-I-av-been-there realism is marred by this fantasy element where a new girl in Mumbai takes on a stranger to live with her although their relationship is strictly platonic, where this new girl sets up and decorates a new home ‘before’ even getting a job and that of an editor’s assistant at a niche magazine, where Sid greatest challenge towards realising life is tough is to learn to boil an egg!

Its not gritty-it moves at this predictable pace. Its not bad,the problem is its not good either.

Ranbir is very good as this child-man you want to slap and cuddle at the same time. At some level I thought the character and the actor must have had a similar childhood should have helped.(I thought only I viewed this casting in such a manner, but so did one of my best friends). And yes we have a first time plus size friend who isnt reduced to a comic caricature-in fact Lakshmi is as real as friends come. Some how Konkana’s role seems a more cardboard version of her role in ‘Luck by Chance’-it was a sort of deja vu for me.

Over all I would say no harm done in catching it on DVD.

Again cross posted.

Of ‘beautious’ cows and other stars

So I was called a cow. No not in a fit of anger but rather in a fit of mush.

Whattheyy! you say?Exactly my reaction.

You see the Boy thinks cows are a charming lot of animals- so calm, gentle, beautiful, fair (oh, lets not even go into the indian fixation with fair skin here) and ehhmm sexy because lets face it they have big racks!!!

*******************

The other day I was on a company sponsored SAP event at Taj Land’s End where another department of the company was holding a Saif-Deepika meet and greet event.  SAP vs Saifu? Apples and oranges, more like Chocolate and brocolli.

So with strategically timed washroom breaks a colleague and me hovered around the balcony to wait for the stars to appear. Finally after much waiting and much eves dropping on a skinny-ad agency type talking on phone.Saif appears and I was stunned to say the least. To know where I was coming from let me remind you of a time when I had blown kisses at the screen whenever he appeared in Race.

Well what I saw was this. (there is only so much a 2mpx cell phone camera can do,okay? )

You see that flash of white flesh between the two men, thats him! So Saif’s frighteningly pale, not really a strapping 6 footer and I-hate-to-say-this but balding. A thousand schoolgirl fantasies died inside me that day. Kareena can have him..huh!

Oh yeah I saw Deepika too. She is tall, thin and beautiful in real life too.

*******************

I have to come out on one thing here. It punctures all my fake posh-ness when it comes to reading but here it goes. I have read all..four ..of Chetan Bhagats books. There I did it.

Yes i bought the latest one-2 states on the weekend it released. It hurt my fake snobbery so much that I bought an Orhan Pamuk to hide it. And I read it on the plane journey back and chuckled all the way at the stereotypes which do unfortunately hold true to this day.

There is a line in the book when the depressed hero turns a workaholic and his boss finds his dedication impressive and says “Citibank sees a bright future in you” or something in those lines and the hero thinks how  Citibank seeing a bright future in him translates into him having no life.

May be this is what makes Bhagat top the bestseller list within a day of release. He hits the nail on the head.

PS: May the festival of lights bring you loads of luck and happiness.

Its not Diwali here because one is no longer in Dilli.

And you thought going to Europe was expensive

The flight rates between Bangalore-Kolkata over the coming weekend.

The routes cover everything from Lucknow-Delhi-Goa-Vizag.

Because my elitist and expensive institution is better than your elitist and expensive institution

Another day and another best BSchool ranking is out and the school I went to has slipped from the top ten to an inglorious 22nd. The alumni are busy cursing the daylights off the current media relations committee and the school in general.Its another matter the same publication had given us some 15ish rank for past 2 years.

Now its the industry’s worst kept secret not to get too swayed by the rankings.Esp those where institutes like ICFAI make top ten of India.But the truth of the matter is there ARE students who look at the rankings from such “reputed” magazines very seriously esp when the institute in questions isnt an IIM and isnt a private insti with special PR cell.In fact most people wont have heard of this school unless some one you knew studied there limited as it is to taking only engineers.

There is only so much a committee of students can do.And there is only so much one director of placements can do. When the rest of the babus running the show realise we are no IIM and need to build a brand equity to get anywhere in todays race to grab the best talent then only something can be done.

Hell, one building institutions are climbing ahead of our 63 acres in infrastructure rankings. I really dont know who was sleeping more-the person who did the ranking or our insti people.

**Cross posted at my new tumblr account

Where I prove beyond doubt that I need to get a life

Half of today was spent playing around with tumblr. As if i need more social media in my life!

Finally I created a blogging account there as well and did some small posts. The boy hates the psychedelic colors, the font and even my English.

But you know how it is with new things and me. I have to use it and use it all the time till I get bored of it. So it maybe a passing fancy or maybe later WSW will merge into it. I do not know. WSW is too close to my heart and connected me to so many other bloggers that I dare not give it up. What I hope my tumblr account will be is a surrogate where I do quick posts like links to awesome videos, do celeb gossip mongering etc.Cross posting is a given and I hope its a lil more snarky.

Obviously for someone who cant even manage one blog-two is pretty much a long shot. Lets see how it goes.

Obviously I expect everyone to drop by and give me your take.Should I, shouldnt I?

New poft!

Its been over a month since I have updated my blog. It would be silly to say I was busy finding a place to live, supervising ABAP code changes and jet setting (ahemm..) to write a single line. If you love something badly enough you would find time to accommodate it. Apparently I prefer living in my MS Outlook to any other activity in this world if my past month is anything to go by.

So I have taken this apartment which is fully furnished and am paying a bomb for it causing for much “look who moved to a penthouse” like jokes among friends. Some how its hard to make others understand how I have always wanted to have my own place and decorate it the way I want(Right now the place is done up the way the house owners wife wants though) and live the way I want.

As I have often told people around me-I am living my adolescence in my twenties.

Moving is tough. Post movement cleaning is tougher. And buying a pressure cooker is the toughest. So you do what an independent, strong woman of today does. Call the parents.

So they are here. Mother is feeding multiple meals whose sum exceeds 3 during the day because even in my current rhino like avatar I appear like Ethopian citizen to her. One can only see what one wants to see. Now if the rest of the world also saw the Kate Moss proportions where Guddi  Maruti exists (Guddi who? Here is who. Yes I am an 90s child).

The work is picking up pace. Which means no time to chuckle over forwards and no sly surfing web world in minimized windows. Hell I don’t even log into gtalk these days. I am currently living the paradigm of “work expands to fill all available time”.

I am watching a lot of TV though. I am totally addicted to Khatron ke Khiladi where you have awesome stunts punctuated by English as can only be spoken by Khiladi Kumar.

Also managed to catch an episode of India’s answer to CSI-the almost gazillion year old CID. ACP Pardyuman , Daya and Abhijeet  still rule roost as do cutting edge sleuthing techniques like carrying around evidence like weapon of murder to suspects home and of course the slap by a CID inspector which is a precursor to every  suspect’s confession of guilt.

Also late night every respectable channel does what is expected of respectable TV channels. Run teleshopping ads where one can “melt away excess fat” by drinking Dr.tea or cure the evil eye by wearing the “Nazar Suraksha kawach”(this is one TVC you shouldn’t miss, unfortunately couldn’t find it on youtube-but buri nazarred rays coming out of people’s eyes-awesome SFX!!)

Then again its tough to decide whether I should watch this or an hour of India TV to soothe them overworked nerves.

I have also recently discovered tumblr and am loving it. As if I needed another place to post whats happening in my life in addition to this blog+twitter+facebook+orkut+gtalk.

PS: title shows I think Kaminey was awesomeness on 70mm. The laughing fit I fell into when Charlie goes “manhoof” or the sing song confession from Guddu cant be described in words. The boy finds this purposeful lisping I have been doing ever since very very fupid

And this my friend is life.

Its disorienting to be in charge. To go from “being dependent” to “having dependents”.

Its weird to see your parents listen to you. To hear yourself  scold them as you run out of patience answering the same question, again and again.And again. And again. Their memories developing sieves.

To see they have nothing else to do but fuss over you. No where to go. No one to meet. No deadlines to keep.

They were black haired and quick on feet once. With wicked gossip from neighbourhood and office. Now all they talk about is the pain-in-the-joints and the nasal block.

Its soul crushing to see the ravages that time has on people you love and to think of atrocities it still has in store.

Airport sagas

So long time see ehh??

So we are back in namma Bengaluru. Not before we were introduced to a concept they call excess baggage.

Now this concept assumes serious proportions when one is allowed 20kgs on board but when one weighs the suitcases which come to whopping 45kgs discounting two stuffed about to burst at seams polys holding everything from yoga mat to newspaper basket.

Why did I buy the things I can get for much cheaper price in India from Singapore? One word my friend. It was on SALE. (four words, details..phhffft..)

Anyhow the airline website mentioned vaguely about excess baggage being 0.015% on highest economy fare of the sector. Highly helpful information considering I had no clue what the highest economy fare was. Calls were made to airline counter from 3 different metros in India (but not the one where I was heading to) and all three came up with 3 different rates. However each of the rates meant I was about to pay in 5 digits as excess luggage.

Many bottles of shampoos, shower gells were unceremoniously discarded on receiving this information.

Many friends came up with suggestions.

1. Reach early and smile at the lady at the counter and then later make sad face when asked for excess charge
2. Reach early and make eyes at single Indian engineer with only cabin luggage and request him to check in some as his.
3. Reach early and pay excess luggage.

The common factor in all suggestions was to reach early. Which I did for my 6 am flight. Full 2 hours before take off. To be told the flight will now take off at 8.

I used this opportunity to look for single Indian engineer with only cabin luggage. However all single Indian engineers seemed to want to bring one Sony Bravia 32” LCD home. Also crotch fitting jeans and loud conversations in Bhojpuri ensured I took my luggage and sat in a corner.

Finally counter opened. It was either suggestion 1 or suggestion 3 now. Or suggestion 1 followed by suggestion3.

I was the first one in line.

I checked in 30kgs.

I prayed to half of the million Gods we have.

Lady cuts the ticket , pauses and then says” Gate E20, boarding begins at 7”

I grab the boarding pass and run into immigrations.

With my laptop bag and a big polythene trailing behind.

I am so happy I almost bought 2 new bags.Almost.

Boarding time. I sit next to 2 mushtande uncles. As usual.

Except mushtande uncles help me lift my 15kg cabin luggage.

Keep my immigration form and lunch safely till I finish my sleep.

I wake up, eat and promptly go back to sleep.

Wake up again to see they have cleared my table as well.

And when the plane lands, they get down my heavy duty luggage without me asking any help.

All this without despo attempts to strike up conversations or “know me better” in any way.

Wow or what??

However the day would soon change trends when I would reach Bengaluru and start out on the next major task of my life-Finding a house for WSW.

However to those who may be interested. Much chocolate was bought to be distributed. Much chocolate at this point is residing between throat and digestive tract as they wait for their green card clearance for permanent settlement on hips.

The bags and shoes bought are yet to see light of day. Running to catch Volvo in the morning over potholes in 3” doesn’t make much sense, does it? New perfume ensures I smell like candy all day.

Sometimes I want to eat myself.

Maybe I should stop. Now.

So how old did you say she was?

Pic Courtesy